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You saved a talking cat one day, but it ran off after promising you that it will return the favor next time it sees you. You never thought that it would show up years later on your wedding day, screaming at you, “We gotta go, MEOW!”

“Rufus, dude, NOW!?” Jimmy exclaims under his breath. His bride to be’s face scrunched up in frustration.

“How well do you think you know this girl? HMM!?” Rufus snaps, looking at the bride behind them.

“Do you trust her?”

“What? Yes, of course I do!” Jimmy lulls to a mumble “I wouldn’t be standing here if I didn’t…”

Rufus starts frantically cleaning his paws “Well kiddo, I got bad news, you really can’t trust the gal and we really need to leave.”

Rufus leaps ontop of Jimmy’s shoulders, heads close enough to converse amongst themselves.

“The chick is with the mob, kid.”

Jimmy starts to laugh. Looking around at the people at the wedding, most of them seem normal. Well dressed. She did say her family was Italian, but not THAT kind of Italian.
He looks back at his fiance, Gabriella, still looking mildly annoyed at this interruption of the biggest day of her life. Her family is well off enough, that’s sort of why Jimmy was even there. Pretty gal with a short temper in a rich Italian family.

Oh god, he thought. Maybe he’s right. Not my Gabby…
“Rufus, look, the last time I saw you things were different. I haven’t seen or heard from you since. Now you expect me to just pretend to get cold feet on my wedding?”

“Look around you. You see any of those people out there look a bit… strange?”

Jimmy frantically takes a look around quickly again, scanning the perfectly normal crowd of people sitting in the pews before him. Normal.
“No Rufus, you need t-“

“Kid, the guys in the back.”

Jimmy looks again, at all corners of the chapel. Several large men line the corners. Most of them dressed the same. With the exception of one. Wearing white, with a black rose pinned to his shirt. Completely shaven head, a huge obvious scar from the bottom of his left cheek bone down across his lips and ends at the tip of his chin on the right.

An Ace of Spades, tattooed on the other cheek.

“That’s just Gino, the bodyguard.”

“You idiot! That’s not just Gino! They call him ‘Meatballs’ Mallozzi. He’s a known member of the Bacci Crime Family.”
As Rufus gives Jimmy the lowdown, he realizes that Gino is giving him the look he’s seen before. The “I’m going to beat the shit out of this kid” look.

“Oh jesus, look Rufus, even if I were to believe you. Why would I risk pissing off all these mobsters?”

“Because if we don’t, you are gonna get gunned down along with everyone here by Tiger Castellana and his merry band of killer mobsters. Time for the alibi.”

Rufus reaches into the tufts of his grey fur and pulls out a Beretta 92. Pointing it straight into Jimmy’s mouth.

“Alright nobody move a muscle or this floppy piece of linguini gets seasoned with lead!”
(to be continued…)

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1. “The Rewind Reviews”

In this podcast, take old or iconic movies and review them with a fresh perspective. You can incorporate elements of humor, surprise, and current-day analysis to keep your audience engaged.

2. “From High School to Hollywood”

Analyze movies that were set in high school and evaluate them based on your own high school experiences. Are these movies accurate? Overly dramatic? Find out with your fun and personal analysis!

3. “Behind the Bloopers”

Focus on the funniest movie bloopers and discuss them in each episode. The commentary could involve how the blooper could have potentially improved the scene or exploring the story behind how the blooper happened.

4. “Mystery Movie Theater”

Choose a random movie neither of you has seen before and provide real-time commentary as you watch it for the first time. This could create a spontaneous and humorous dynamic as you react to unexpected movie events.

5. “Films Against Humanity”

In this podcast, you can take a fun and irreverent look at some of the worst-rated movies of all time. Discuss what makes them so bad, and maybe even offer suggestions for how they could have been improved.

6. “The Movie Roast”

Choose a movie and humorously “roast” it, focusing on its shortcomings, plot holes, and absurdities. Be sure to keep the tone light-hearted and fun to attract listeners who enjoy a good laugh.

7. “Nostalgia Trip”

Take your listeners on a nostalgia trip by reviewing movies from your childhood or adolescence. Discuss how your perception of the movie has changed over time and what you find funny now that you didn’t notice before.

8. “Scene Stealers”

Each episode can focus on discussing and making fun of the most ridiculous and over-the-top scenes in movie history, delving into what makes them so outlandish and entertaining.

9. “Movie Mythbusters”

Debunk or confirm myths, legends, or theories that surround various movies. This could be a fun and educational way to engage your listeners.

10. “DIY Movie Remakes”

As a fun activity, you could recreate scenes from famous movies with a funny twist and describe the process and the outcome on your podcast. It could include improvised scripts, homemade costumes, and more.

Remember that the key to a successful podcast is to maintain a consistent schedule, foster a strong rapport with your audience, and most importantly, to enjoy the process of creating it! Good luck!

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The internet has given way to things that weren’t possible less than 100 years ago. And our life has essentially been surrounded by a war over how we proceed from this point in civilizations history.

It puts me in a depressing haze of emotions to think about it. But often I look out there seeking the elusive “white pill” and pass one onto others if I can.

X is now where I get to remain on the ground as I hear the voice of the people. And yet I am still surprised when I see what the people really have to say.

Considering how X’s algorithm works however, means that oftentimes there are haters in many comments sections simply because people will comment on shit that pissed them off!

Like the angry writer I am, I use my account to yell at the President, dump on corny movies, or give advice on how modern western women really suck at dating.

The internet is here to stay and as far as I’m concerned, it’s best to get your voice out there and heard.

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